


I Need You

by lmmp



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Happy Ending, Insecure Ashton, M/M, One Shot, Self Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-30
Updated: 2013-12-30
Packaged: 2018-01-06 18:19:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1110067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lmmp/pseuds/lmmp
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ashton starts feeling like Luke doesn't love him anymore. Luke had been hanging out with Calum, and ignoring him. So, out of sadness, Ashton beings to relapse cutting.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Need You

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii!! I really hope you like this one shot, I wrote it at two a.m. (:

Ashton's P.O.V.

'What the hell am I doing here?' I thought to myself sitting on the cold mosaic tiles of the hotel bathroom floor. 'I have nothing left to live for.' I repeated horrible words in my head. I've wanted this for the longest time. I just needed to do it. For me and for everyone around me. They'd be so much happier when I was gone. 

Hot tears trailed down my cheeks. 'Just do it already.' I said again. My silent tears turned into full on sobs. I curled up on the bathroom floor. I just couldn't do this anymore. I had scars all over my body, they would never go away. They will be there for the rest of my life. 

Even my own boyfriend doesn't want me anymore. He is always hanging out with Calum. I pretend that it doesn't bother me. He ignores me, he ditches me to go hang out with Cal. He doesn't love me. He never did. He sure as hell won't miss me. My sobs came faster as I thought of where he was right now. Probably making out with Cal. Am I really that bad? 

I yanked off all my bracelets taking my razor out of the back of my cell phone case, and dragging it over my wrist. Repeatedly. Over and over. I glanced down to see a pool of blood where my wrist was bleeding so bad. I cleaned it up fast knowing Luke will be back wanting to use the bathroom. I made sure all the blood was gone before tending to my wrist. Fourteen new cuts. I sighed. I will finish the job tonight. Sliding my bracelets back on my arms making sure you couldn't see, I walked out of the room. 

I stood outside Calum and Michael's door. I sighed, before knocking lightly. Waiting for someone to answer I fixed my rubber bracelets. 

"Hey! Come on in!" Michael said cheerfully looking at me. 

"Thanks." I murmured, entering their room. My heart hit the ground as I saw Calum tickling Luke. Fury arose inside of me. Part if me wanted to cry, but another part wanted to yank Calum off my boyfriend. 'He doesn't love you, your pathetic.' My head screamed. I grimaced, wanting to shake the thought but I knew it was true. 

"Can we talk?" I looked up to see Michael standing in front of me, blocking my vision of the two boys. I shrugged my shoulders in response. Michael took my hand pulling me into his room. "What's up?" 

"Nothin much, got bored and decided to come see you guys." I responded flashing my famous fake smile. 

"Ashton." He snapped. I knew it, he was onto me. 

"Yes?" I asked, smiling. 

"Your lying." He replied. Why did I come here in the first place? 

"No, really." I smiled, "I pinky promise." 

"Okay." He sighed getting up reluctantly. "If you need me I'm here." he said leaving the room. Tears filled my eyes. I didn't need anyone but Luke. I want my boyfriend back. I sobbed into my hands. What did I do to deserve this? Why didn't he just break up with me? I want him to hold me and kiss me like he used to. Before he started getting close to Cal. Most importantly, I wanted him to love me again. He hasn't told me he loved me in over a month. 

I got up dusting off my black jeans belfry checking myself in the mirror before leaving the room. Back out in the living area, the boys were watching a movie. Michael was against the sides Calum in the middle and Luke on the end. I smiled to myself walking over and siting beside Luke, being squished. Luke made paid no attention to my arrival. I glanced over at him. He was so beautiful. He had on a black beanie with an Asking Alexandria shirt and black jeans with his lip ring. 

I turned my attention to the screen. What the hell is happening anyways? I don't even know the name of this. Luke let out a laugh along with Cal. I jumped a bit when I felt something touch my shoulder. I looked to see Calum's arm swung around Luke. I saw Luke's laying on the couch. I was tempted to grab it and remind him that he's mine. But knowing me, I didn't. 

After the movie, the boys where talking. "Hey guys I'm gonna go." I said, remembering my plan. 

"Okay see you tomorrow yeah?" Michael said, hugging me. 

"Yeah." I murmured to him, glancing back at my boyfriend who had his head thrown back in laughter to whatever Cal had said. 

"I'm sure he will be over soon." Michael reassured me. I nodded leaving. Outside my door, I realized I forgot my key inside. I groaned. Fuck. Now what? I had to get Luke. Oh. I knocked on the door again. "Oh. Fancy seeing you here." Michael said laughing. 

"Yeah, yeah. I'm locked out.." I replied to his snarky comment. 

"Oh. Go ahead." He gestured into the room. I nodded. I walked over to Luke and Cal. I tapped on his shoulder. 

"Luke?" I asked softly. He turned around. His eyes meeting mine. "I'm um locked out." I scratched my head nervously. 

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow Cal. Same to you Michael." He waved, and Cal playfully blew him a kiss making my stomach flip. We exited the room, walking down the hall it was silent. He slid the card into the card slot, watching the red light turn green. He entered the room, I ran in behind him. 

"Sorry." I mumbled as I accidentally bumped into him. I slid past him heading to the bathroom. But he grabbed my wrist. I winced, praying that he didn't notice. 

"Ash." I turned to look at him. "Please don't tell me that you-" 

"No, babe. I'm perfectly fine." I yanked my wrist back. 

"Ashton." He grabbed my wrist yet again, I bit my lip hard. I felt blood on my mouth. "I think we need I talk." 

"I don't think so." I knew what was gonna happen. 

"I really have to tell you something." He replied. My heart sunk. Oh dear god. He's breaking up with me. " I think that recently-" Before he got anymore words out I was in tears. 

"No. Luke, please I'll do anything. Please don't do this." I pleaded, my vision blurring. Suddenly I felt weak, but I shook it off. "I need you. I need you. You'll all I have." I couldn't read his expression before I dashed off into the bathroom. Collapsing into the cold floor, crying my eyes out. 

"Ash. Come on." I heard him on the outside of the door. He swung open the door beige kneeling beside me. "What's going on with you?" 

"With m-me?" I yelled. "Your my b-boyfriend but you don't l-love me. You act like I d-don't exist. Maybe you'd be happier with Cal." I mumbled getting off the ground and heading out of the door. 

"What!" He grabbed my hips turning me around to face him. "Ashton. Look at me." I shook my head. "Ash." He raised my chin up to look at him. "Baby I love you. I don't want Calum. I want you. That's why I asked you to date me. I thought you were going to break up with me, since you were hanging out with Gemma. That's why I was hanging out with Cal. I love you so much. I don't want to break up with you. Back there I was just going to tell you that I was sorry for not paying as much attention to you." 

"Really?" I mumbled, smiling slightly. 

"Yes really, I think you are perfect, by the way." He took my hand, removing the bracelets. I attempted to yank my hand away but he just held it tighter. Once he bracelets were all off he flipped my arm over to the cuts. He kissed each one, the old ones and new ones. Once he was done he looked down at me. "I love you." He said. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my lips to his. 

"Not more than I love you." I said, kissing him again. He pulled away looked at me. 

"I want you to stop." He said looking into my glossy eyes. 

"I-I don't know if I can." I said as a tear escaped my eyes. 

"I need you here, Ashton." He said, meeting my stare. 

"No yo-" I started. 

"No. I fucking love you. I can't live without you. So." He took my hands in his intertwining out fingers, "If you go I go." My eyes widen.

"Luke that's preposterous." 

"It's the way it's gonna be. If you leave me here. I'm going with you." 

"Baby." 

"That's a promise." 

"Fine." He smiled leaning down capturing my lips in his, releasing my fingers moving his hands to my face, cupping it. 

"When I said I loved you, I meant it Ashton." He said, I chuckled at his puffy lips. 

"I meant it when I said I loved you too, Luke." I replied staring at him. 

"Forever?" He held out his pinky, chuckling I did the same. 

"Forever.


End file.
